The stupidity of boys – and men

Johnny Unitas

I don’t claim to represent all males and hope I’m an exception, but here’s a quick story about just how stupid boys can be.

I was about twelve and a voracious reader. I loved sports and sports stories and read a biography of the football great Johnny Unitas. I didn’t know he was blind in one eye and was fascinated to learn he was so exceptional even with that handicap. How could he be that good and blind in one eye? It gave me hope. At least I had two eyes.

It seems that he and his pals, when they were kids, found a stash of 22 bullets. One of the crew – the smart one, I’m sure – found a board with a long split. The boys wedged a bullet down into the crack and propped the board up with the rear-end of the bullet facing them. With handfuls of rocks, they started pelting the bullet and board until they heard the POP! of the small shell. While they yelled for joy, Johnny fell to the ground. Who knows what happened, but the bullet’s head was likely caught in the wood and the explosion pushed the shell backward into Johnny’s eye. The damage was permanent, and it’s a testament to his skill that he could play sports at such a high level with only one seeing eyeball.

Fast forward twenty years to me and Terry and Alfred and Rocky rummaging around who knows where until we found a few 22 shells. I don’t know how old we were, but I remembered the Unitas story. “Hey, guys. I know what we should do with these.” And I told the whole story. We all looked at each other and thought this is the greatest idea we’ve ever heard. Bullet in wood. Rocks at bullet. Bullet blinds boy for good. What could be more fun??

And we did it. We found the right piece of wood and set up the target and never got a bullet to fire. Duds! What a crappy day! No explosion and no one was blinded!

So, if you ever wonder about boys being stupid – here’s one vote on the Yes side.


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2 thoughts on “The stupidity of boys – and men

    1. LOL. We mixed anything we could find. Actually made some stuff that blew one time. Right in my friends bedroom. His thick German mother did an Olympic sprint to see what we burned down.

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